My Little Buckaroo
Coulter and I at camp together.
Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you. James 4:8
Coulter didn’t realize, when he left us, that there would be an ever-present hole in our hearts and lives, or that we would miss spending time with him, even in mundane things like projects we do and would have done with him.
The first project Coulter and I did together was a flooring project in our home in CA, when he was 8. He came in early in the morning and wanted to help. I got to show him how to read a tape measure, mark his cuts, and guided his hands as we used the miter saw together. Mostly, though, we just spent the day talking and working side by side.
We listened to country music, not because either of us loved it, but because my father did. I have a ritual that when I am working on a car or a house, etc., I listen to country to remind me of my dad, who died in 2001, and in a way, spend time with him.
The song “Watching You” by Rodney Atkins came on, and I teared up. Coulter wanted to know why I was crying, and I told him that he was my little buckaroo, and I knew one day he was going to be a much better man than I am, and he was already on his way.
He stayed there and worked side by side with me all day, as we talked and listened to country music. I was so proud of him. Sure, I was proud that at 8, he was able to work with me for a solid workday. But mainly, I was proud that he wanted to spend time with me. He just wanted to be with me, and I wanted to be with him.
I loved that day. I loved him. I will cry every time I hear that song. I miss my little buckaroo.
Our Loving Father delights when His children want to spend time with Him. And He desires to spend time with us, even in the mundane. If we draw close to Him, He will draw close to us; yes, to guide us and instruct us, but also just because He loves us.
Over the years, Coulter and I worked on many projects together. And we always listened to country music when we did.
If you get a chance, listen to “Watching You,” and think of Coulter, or maybe a little buckaroo that is in your life, and how precious the mundane moments are.
Unfortunately, I don’t have a single picture of us doing projects together. We don’t take pictures of ordinary events in life. We think we have all the time in the world. Cherish every moment. Not because something awful might happen. But just because they truly are precious.
You are Loved More Than You Know.
#coulterslight
Coulter and I next to the 1990 Mustang my father gave me when I was 16 and I in turn gave Coutler when he turned 16. We had just started fixing it up together.